Mysteries of my Universe

Observations from last night's gig.

Why contract the band to start at 8pm and then tell the band, before they ever play a note, that they want you to play so soft that the diners won't her you? Those diners, by the way, were to my immediate right. The only thing separating us--a 3/4 wall. I couldn't see the diners, but I could see (and hear) the people standing three deep at the bar and to my immediate left. People who had been drinking for an hour (or three) and wanted to dance. But I rolled with the punches. It's what I do. I typically play the AC casinos where punches are aplenty.

I don't plan to wear polyester pants and moo-moo smock thingees buttoned to my chin when I'm 65 (and up). But I do think there is a time when a woman should give up wearing things like halter tops, tube tops, mid-thigh skirts (especially with no stockings), and hip-hugger jeans with appliques and rhinestones. I'm not judging. I'm just sayin'.

While on break and minding my own bees wax, a woman (picture a variation of the above) comes over to me with her husband (or whatever) and starts talking to me about other singers that have performed at this club. Not their voices or repertoire, but their breasts. I'll spare you the details, but basically they were certain most all of them had had boob jobs. Why, oh, why, would you ever strike up this conversation with a stranger? Were they subtlety asking if I'd had one? It's called a Wonder bra folks. I did not contribute much to the conversation, just shrugged a lot. Finally they got up to leave. "Nice talking to you," they said. "An intellectual thrill," I thought. "Have a nice evening," I said.

Those were the highlights of my night. Now I'm off to the library where I get to ponder the mystery of some parents who allow their little ones to trash the children's section, and then leave without picking up after them. Or better yet, teaching the kids to pick up after themselves.

You guessed it. I haven't had my coffee yet.

Comments

Cyn said…
Your gig experience sounds like more fodder for TCC!

As for the library, if I had a child, he or she would certainly be taught to have respect. I suppose most importantly it is by example.

Thanks for sharing. Hang in there!
Beth Ciotta said…
Oh, yes, C. I thought the same thing. More fodder for "The Chameleon Chronicles". The scene's already in my head. LOL The fun thing is that Evie can/will say things that I never would. Heh-heh.

As for the library thing... what you said. :)
Mary Stella said…
Ohh, B! Too bad you couldn't mention something like, "Singers look out at the crowd and count the number of customers who would benefit from the services of a professional stylist."

That rude couple! Grrrr
Jennifer Elbaum said…
Beth -- what doesn't kill us makes us stronger (or for writers -- what makes us want to kill people makes for better stories!)
Gabriele C. said…
She probably wanted to talk Whatever into paying for her boob job and was now trying to convince him that it was normal to have boob jobs, that everyone had them, that you need a boob job if you're going to wear a halter top ....

Can we say bimbo? *grin*
Beth Ciotta said…
Mary, that's too funny. I wouldn't say that, but Evie might. Heh-heh. Wait I take that back. Confession. I WOULD say that, but only to Iggy or Nick (my keyboardist and guitarist. They had their own comments. Trust me. ;)

Iggy to me: "Is that a really short dress or a beach cover-up?"

Me to Iggy: I believe that's a tunic, meant to be worn with jeans. Only she forgot the jeans.

*g*
Beth Ciotta said…
"...0r for writers -- what makes us want to kill people makes for better stories!"

Don't I know it, Jenn! :)
Beth Ciotta said…
Thanks for the much needed giggle, Gabriele. *snicker* I'm telling you, it was totally weird.

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